Four Months

Four months have come and gone. They just sort of pass right by without me even knowing it. I have been back to work for a little more than a month and it is hard. The things some people say that they think is helpful is actually kind of painful. One lady actually said "She's probably better off now." How she walked away with her face intact is beyond me. I think I was shocked that someone would actually say that to a grieving mother. But like always, I don't say or do anything because I know it would get ugly and I'd probably lose my job, so I take the "professional" road and just walk away.
Hopefully we get started planning your fundraiser that I want to have on your first birthday. We only have 6 months left so we really need to get started.
The holidays are coming too and it's going to be really hard without you here. Last year during the holidays I kept thinking what it was going to be like with you here. I had picked out some gifts that we would get for you for Christmas. Shopping is going to be hard, celebrating anything is going to be hard.
October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day. Everyone is supposed to light a candle in honor of the babies that have been lost. I never knew about this day and think it is sad that something like this exists. Babies are the most precious gift and parents should not ever have to say goodbye.
We miss you a lot. We always will. You will always be our little baby girl!